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Obama suggests tapping oil reserve to cut prices


  1. Don’t worry, Obama is in the ‘don’t believe anything I say’ phase of his campaign. He has to have an answer to ‘drill now.’ His honest answer is: ‘Tough shit, I’m a wholly owned subsidiary of the environmental lobby groups. High gas prices are good; peasants shouldn’t be driving around clogging the roads.’ Out loud he says, ‘Let’s tap strategic oil reserves’

  2. ‘Tapping the strategic oil reserve is not a substitute for a real plan to increase supply through additional drilling and nuclear power,’ said McCain spokesman Tucker Bounds.’ HUH? What does nuclear power have to do with the oil reserves?

  3. Now this is just Minnesota funny. The Presidential election was too close to call. Neither the Republican candidate nor the Democratic candidate had enough votes to win.. There was much talk about ballot recounting, court challenges, etc., but a week-long ice fishing competition seemed the sportsmanlike way to settle things. The candidate that caught the most fish at the end of the week would win the election. Therefore, it was decided that there should be an ice fishing contest between the two candidates to determine the winner. After much of back and forth discussion, it was decided that the contest take place on a remote froz en lake in northern Minnesota. There were to be no observers present, and both men were to be sent out separately on this isolated lake and return at 5 P.M. with their catch for counting and verification by a team of neutral parties. At the end of the first day, John McCain returned to the starting line and he had ten fish. Soon, Obama returned and had no fish. Well, everyone assumed he was just having another ‘bad hair’ day or something and hopefully, he would catch up the next day. At the end of the 2nd day John McCain came in with 20 fish and Obama came in again with none. That evening, Harry Reid got together secretly with Obama and said, ‘Obama, I think John McCain is a low-life, cheatin’ son-of-a-gun. I want you to go out tomorrow and don’t even bother with fishing. Just spy on him and see just how he is cheating.’ The next night (after John McCain returns with 50 fi sh), Harry said to Obama, ‘Well, tell me, how is John McCain cheating?’ Obama replied, ‘Harry, you’re not going to believe this, but he’s cutting holes in the ice!’

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