Archive for the ‘WTF’ Category

For those of you who have had some of your faith in humanity restored on this blessed day, I direct your attention to the STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL:

This appears to be the whole thing. Watch it if you dare.

Reagan shooter wants more time outside hospital

The man who attempted to assassinate President Ronald Reagan is asking to spend more time outside a Washington mental hospital, but a government lawyer says John Hinckley’s request is premature and that he recently lied to cover up the fact he looked at books on Reagan and presidential assassinations.

Murdoc didn’t know that this guy already was allowed 10-day visits to his mother’s home. During one of them, he said he was going to a movie and instead went to a Barnes & Noble to look at books about Reagan and presidential assassinations. He didn’t know the Secret Service was watching him.

Here’s Murdoc’s simple one-step test to see whether or not increased freedom should be considered:

1) Is the subject still breathing?

If the answer is YES, it is premature to consider additional freedom.

Oh, Look…It’s another leftist lying about his military service: Army records at odds with Occupy veteran’s claims

The claims of a dedicated member of the Occupy Buffalo movement that he saw combat in Iraq and Afghanistan are not supported by Army records.

Christopher M. Simmance has told several media outlets, including The Buffalo News, that he served as many as three tours of duty in those war zones and that he was severely injured in Afghanistan.

Service records obtained from the Army, however, show he was stationed at Fort Lewis, Wash., for three years and he left the active-duty Army in January 2001 — before the 9/11 terror attacks.

Liar Christopher M Simmance, dedicated member of the Occupy movement

Liar Christopher M Simmance, dedicated member of the Occupy movement

Simmance says his records are “incomplete” and that he “stands by” his claims of serving in the Special Forces, of being wounded in an RPG attack in Afghanistan, of also serving in Gaza, and of only having ten years to live due to his injuries.

Oh, and he claims to have served in “The Valley of Elah.”

Hahahahahahahaha.

We all know that the military has been known to screw up records once or twice before, but Murdoc’s not holding his breath that this guy is genuine. First of all, some people claiming to know him say that he’s “exaggerated” his service record. Second of all, many of the places he says he’s served seem to come from movies. Finally, the guy’s own mother “doesn’t believe any of it.”

Looks like Christopher M. Simmance is a liar.

Debunking, uncovering, and just plain mocking the Occupier movement could be a full-time job, but some things just stand out:

Occupy Wall Street protesters stay at $700-a-night hotel

The $700-per-night W Hotel Downtown last week hosted both Peter Dutro, one of a select few OWS members on the powerful finance committee, and Brad Spitzer, a California-based analyst who not only secretly took part in protests during a week-long business trip but offered shelter to protesters in his swanky platinum-card room.

“Tents are not for me,” he confessed…

Dutro, 35, one of only a handful of OWS leaders in charge of the movement’s $500,000 in donations, checked in on Wednesday, the night after police emptied Zuccotti Park…

“I knew everything was going to be a clusterf–k in the morning,” he told The Post, alluding to Occupy’s own disruption plans. “How would I get over the bridge when they were shutting it down?”

Oink oink, piggy piggy.

Via Jammie Wearing Fool via Instapundit, who writes

It really is getting more and more like Animal Farm all the time, isn’t it?

Animal Farm has been on my family reading list for a while, and the whole devolution of the Occupier movement has had me thinking that perhaps I should put our current family read (Battlefield Earth by L. Ron Hubbard) on hold to get in while it’s so clearly relevant.

I really thought that once all the kids hoping to get their college loans paid for with tax dollars went home, enough serious people would be left to form a valid political movement, sort of Left-leaning cousin to the Tea Party. But it looks like most of the serious people (well, besides the serious Marxists and anarchists) went home, too.

Wisconsin DNC is apparently organizing the effort to canvas local cemeteries for signatures on their petition to force a recall vote for Governor Scott Walker. What losers.

I think that starting in 2012, Wisconsin voters will be required to show ID before voting. To Murdoc, it seems insane that it was ever possible to vote WITHOUT showing ID, but whatever. It’s the law now.

That will probably hurt their chances at the polls, but it won’t stop dead people from showing up on the petition to get the issue on the ballot in the first place.

Murdoc hopes this is a hoax. He thinks it probably isn’t.

Farmers cry foul over proposed new rules for young workers

The US Department of Labor has proposed new rules that would eliminate a large chunk of what kids under 16 years of age can do on a farm:

    The changes would:

  1. Exempt children working on farms owned 100 percent by their parents from most of the new rules.
  2. Strengthen rules for working with animals, pesticides, timber operations, manure pits and storage bins.
  3. Prohibit workers under 16 from operating almost all power-driven equipment.
  4. Prohibit youth in both agricultural and nonagricultural employment from using cell phones, walkie-talkies, etc. while operating power-driven equipment.
  5. Prohibit farmworkers under 16 from participating in cultivation, harvesting and curing of tobacco.
John Deere 4630

John Deere 4630
No Kids Allowed

Here is an important point regarding #1:
Partnerships between parents and children or siblings would mean their children would not be exempt.

To Murdoc, this seems like a pretty major exemption for the exemption. I don’t have any overall numbers, but many of the “family farms” run by people I know are partnerships between family members. If two brothers are partners on a family farm, neither brother’s kids would be eligible to drive a tractor.

Full disclosure: Murdoc grew up on a farm in Minnesota. Murdoc operated all sorts of heavy equipment at a young age. He also learned important safety tips like “Stay the ‘F’ away from that P.T.O. shaft!” (Although Murdoc’s dad, uncles, and grandfather would never have used that ‘F’ word, he’s pretty sure they meant it anyway, more or less…)

More from the article:

Alto farmers Bob and Jami Goble are the sole owners of their farm where they have about 175 beef cattle, so their children are not affected. But they won’t be hiring anymore high school students, Jami Goble said.

“I find it ridiculous that this is even something they’re trying to pass,” she said. “Most farm kids are very well-rounded individuals and I have a hard time imagining that someone wants to end that.”

Mrs. Goble, Murdoc is pretty sure that ending the existence of “very well-rounded individuals” is exactly what a lot of people want.

Even restricting the use of cell phones and walkie-talkies while driving a tractor or farm truck, which might seem like a reasonable move at first glance to non-farmers, would be a hardship. This is the 21st century. Many of the things that keep our farmers able to feed people are due to technological advances. It’s not at all the same situation as cell phone use while driving a car on a public roadway. Suddenly Uncle Jim can’t call Bobby and have him bring the trailer to the back field.

One day in the early 80s, young Murdoc was driving a John Deere 4630 in the field out back, pulling a trailer for his dad, uncle, and older cousin who were picking up (or maybe putting down) a pipeline for an irrigation system. Murdoc certainly had the best job out there that day, as what was being pumped through those pipes was NOT cool, clean water, and the pipes stank to high heaven. Anyway, my dad had to run back and forth from where they were working to tell me where to take the tractor next. At some point while I sat idle, I zoned out a bit and my dad couldn’t get my attention. So he threw a clod of dirt at the tractor so I would get it in gear again. The whole morning probably took twice as long as it needed to due to all the running back and forth and delays due to inability to communicate easily.

The Department of Labor wants farmers to stop using 21st century communications devices and go back to using clods of dirt.

Of course, as our “family farm” was not 100% owned by my father, I wouldn’t have been driving that tractor in the first place under these new rules. We would have had to use an adult employee all morning to sit in a tractor and do what nearly any 9-year-old could do.

Never mind the effect these new restrictions would have on kids, and Murdoc thinks the effects would be significantly damaging. The impact on farmers would be noticeable. Which would create a noticeable impact on food prices. Which would create a noticeable impact on the economy. Which would lead, of course, to additional government meddling to help all the poor people who can barely get by.

It’s almost like there’s a plan, or something.

Homemade Bulldozer Battleship Joins Libya Fight

Land Battleship: An anti-Gaddafi fighter flashes victory signs on an armored bulldozer during violent clashes with pro-Gaddafi forces at the frontline in center Sirte.

Land Battleship: An anti-Gaddafi fighter flashes victory signs on an armored bulldozer during violent clashes with pro-Gaddafi forces at the frontline in center Sirte.

Onto a battlefield littered with bizarre homemade weaponry, Libya’s ruling militia fighters have rolled out their weirdest contraption yet: a concrete and steel behemoth that’s a cross between a bulldozer and a battleship.

The towering monster, which appeared Wednesday in Sirte to help capture Muammar Qaddafi’s home town, has a battleship’s pointed prow and portholes along its sides with steel covers that can be pulled down…

The vehicle is also manned by four gunners who have five heavy machine guns to fire and a tank gun mounted on top.

The driver cannot see out. There had been a video camera set up to provide a view, but it was shot away.

The Libyan navy finally has a ship that no one can sink.

That’s a double-duty title, folks.

Air and Space Museum closed after guards mace anti-war protesters

When told they could not bring their protest signs into the museum, the crowd apparently got a little out of hand.

The group that arrived at the museum Saturday included individuals affiliated with the October 2011 Stop the Machine demonstration, which has been going on in the city’s Freedom Plaza and has an anti-war and anti-corporate greed message.

The group also included protesters affiliated with Occupy D.C., a group modeled on the Occupy Wall Street protests in New York City. Occupy D.C. has been holding marches and meetings in Washington’s McPherson Square.

They wanted to protest a museum. Though I believe that many of the protesters have got legit gripes about things and that many of them just want what’s right, the movement seems to be just a bunch of people running around doing what the queen bees tell them to.

What a bunch of jackasses.

At Auschwitz, future U.S. military leaders learn what not to do

Yeah. Because otherwise they would have set up concentration camps and genocided someone.

Honestly, the story reads like it was written by whoever directed that Coke commercial where everyone wants to teach the world to sing.

Disappoint Mints:

President Barack Obama Disappoint Mints

President Barack Obama Disappoint Mints

Murdoc would have said this was a cheap political gimmick. Until they were pulled after Joe Armstrong (D-Knoxville) complained. Armstrong, who apparently is as thin-skinned as they come, whined and simpered that the mints were not “viewpoint neutral.”

The bookstore owner said that he had carried mints poking fun at George W. Bush during the previous administration. Joe ‘Crybaby’ Johnson didn’t seem to get his poor little feelings hurt by that version though.

Via Glenn Reynolds, who wrote:

They told me if I voted for John McCain, we’d see creepy censorship of political humor. And they were right!

UPDATE: The company that makes the mints fought back by producing Joe Armstrong Strong Arm Censored Mints.


Military Hive Logo
Valid XHTML 1.0 Transitional